Looker-Forward Looking Back

I have never been a very reflective person. Tara either. We are bad with family pictures, scrapbooks, kid videos and more. The good side of this is that we are always looking forward, planning and purposeful in our steps. The bad side is that we don’t appreciate what we have and savor the good things of life.

Since February, I have been remembering much more through blogging. And I like it. It has been a treat for me to live in that world for a while. But over time I am being drawn back to what is more innate. That is looking forward. And once again missing out on the joys and benefits of reflection.

We sat in Dr. Bible’s office yesterday while he and a new oncology fellow spat out their medical jargon about what has gone on. It was like they forgot we were there and spoke in their own language for a brief moment. They spoke things like “The small left pleural effusion and mild associated pleural nodularity have resolved, including the left anterior pleural nodule. The small pericarial effusion present 1/29/2013 has decreased. Anterior mediastinal, left supraclavicular, and bilateral internal mammary lymphadenopathy has resolved.” And it went on and on.

Somehow we understood all that was said. It was like they were speaking clearly the miracles of God and we knew it. The short version of the findings; the CA125 is undetectable, the pockets of fluid are decreasing in all areas (around heart, in abdomen), there are no tumors, white and red blood cells are close to normal, there is no numbness in the extremities (which evidently is common with extended chemo), there are no internal problems remaining from the surgery, and this goes on and on.

We don’t pretend to put God in a box to say that the only way he can show his power is through healing. But we believe for the present time, he could be showing his power this way. Far more often his power is shown through unexplainable hope in the midst of trials. Through survival when destruction seems imminent. Through using a situation like this to build faith. He has been doing miracles all along for us.

Yesterday was a great day. It won’t be hard to reflect on that day often. now three more months until the next appointment. There I go looking ahead again.


24 thoughts on “Looker-Forward Looking Back

  1. We are celebrating with you, big time. God is so gracious to have allowed your body (Tara) to be healed. We will continue praying that it would remain this way. In the meantime, we are doing a happy dance!!!

  2. Praise the Lord!!! That is wonderful news! The beauty of brokenness amidst the trials God walks us through is the grace and mercy we receive. The strength of faith is sometimes more than we can comprehend and sometimes don’t even realize the depth of it until we are on the other side looking back. I am strengthened by your journey as I listen to your walk with God.

    Thank you for sharing,
    Naomi Janz

  3. Tara this report is Amazing and brought tears to my eyes. He is a God that heals and I just pray that each day you gain Strength, Hope and Energy. How blessed we are to have such a BIG GOD! Love you!!

  4. Praising God and rejoicing with all of you! Thanks be to God! The glory and honor are His! Keep running the race! Love and hugs. Pat and Jean Parsley

  5. Praising God. Thank you God for healing, for a break from it, for more days to praise you and learn about you, for more memories in the Maier family… So happy for you Tara. Praying increased strength for you to serve your family as your heart desires. Hugs to each of you. Much love- Navina and all

  6. Praise God from whom all blessings flow
    Praise Him all creatures here below
    Praise Him above ye heavenly host
    Praise Father Son and Holy Ghost.

    Tears of joy filling my eyes, prayers of praise and thanksgiving heading heavenward from my heart……..{{{HUGS!}}}

  7. God has surely mapped your plan out well…… I am so pleased for you all !! Jay & Tara & family — we are so humbled and glad to be part of your family. Jay you eloquence in keeping us all informed of Tara’s journey is nothing short of amazing,,,, when you were right beside her through everything. My hope for you all is the Miracle that has happened because of Pure Faith, living through his word, blessed by the holy spirit, and heal this family, Our payers will not stop as the path is still ben walked. Our loving thoughts pass on to you & all your family. Our love and prayers ill continue. Love you,
    Aunt DeeDee and Uncl Frank

    Aunt DeeDee andUncle F

  8. Yes, well I’m all teary! And believe me, I am continuing to commit to praying for you guys EVERY day! I had “old” guys who committed to pray for me, even when I was OK ……. As I’ve said before, now it’s my turn! I know that “joy” and there is NO feeling like it! So happy for you all……but especially you, Tara.

  9. We are so excited to get this report. Nothing is too big for our God. May you all enjoy this time and celebrate His grace, love and mercy. Thanks for your insights and updates. We love you guys and will continue to pray for you all. We look forward a time when we can see you all, now that we are closer. Excited, Tara, your mom and dad are coming to see us today! hugs and love to you, Aunt Barb and Uncle Gary

  10. Best wishes to you guys for continued success on this journey! You have come so far. To steal a quote from “Meet the Robinsons” – “Keep Moving Forward” or in your case, “Keep looking forward!”


  11. I am so excited for you all. I have thought of you all many times and said quiet prayers for you.
    Jay I hope you continue with your blog. Your writing has a way of touching people or I should say me. God Bless.

  12. We are so happy to hear such good news. Thanks for writing and keeping us updated. Your writings Jay, are so well put on your outlook on everything. God Bless.

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