My day was soooo not interesting, because I basically did nothing. I’d prefer to do something. But I don’t even know what I would like to do. We used to do a lot of stuff as a family, like help at Next Chapter, pack back packs at church, cook at home, have friends over and more. My parents were gone more in the evenings before cancer. Now we stay home a lot more. I notice most that my dad has been home more, and that is good. I have always had a lot of time with my mom. That hasn’t changed.
When I found out mom had cancer I had no idea what to think. I really didn’t know anything about it except it was bad. I did not like mom and dad crying because it made it all seem worse. I have a friend who also has cancer. I understand more how she feels. I now know what it is like to be in a family who has cancer.
Over the last few months, I have asked God a lot more questions about the world. How many people in the world have cancer? How many people struggle with different things, like poverty or sickness or other suffering? Out of those people, how many don’t know God? I haven’t come to any conclusions but I would like to somehow find out. I can’t say my faith has grown since my mom got cancer. But it hasn’t gotten worse either.
It seems like everyone is praying for us. My friends tell me they are praying for me and mom and I am grateful for that. A lot of people help us and I am overwhelmed by how great of a community we live in. I am excited for this to be over and our life to go back to kind of like it was before.
These are the thoughts of an 11 year old girl, the second oldest kid in the Maier family.
And your mom and dad are very proud of you all! Two beautiful writers we have now had the privilege of reading! Blessings are a two way street! You (and you sister) have truly blessed those of us who read what you have written. It helps us when we pray for you. It really does!
Thank you so much for your sharing your personal thoughts. I have an 11 year old daughter too. I also have cancer. Your comments help me get into her world a bit more. I am glad you and your mom spend a lot of time together and now your dad too. As a parent, I know I want to spend fun times with my girls–and not always talk about the cancer. But I also know I want my girls to talk to me about whatever questions they have: questions about the cancer, about God, about how they are doing, about their friends, and all that goes with being an 11 year old girl of a mom with cancer. I bet your mom is a bit like me in that she doesn’t have energy to do the stuff she used to love to do with you. She wants to do it now–but maybe can’t. But I love it when I take a nap and one of my girls lays down on the bed next to me and looks at my ceiling alongside of me and just chats. Reading books together like that is precious. And during the times I have good energy, I love taking little walks (when it is not raining or snowing here in town!) or cooking up stuff in the kitchen together.
I just wanted again to say thanks for sharing yourself (and your whole family). God is using you to minister to others you do not even know. Blessings to you!! And yes, I am praying for you all too.
Thank you for your perspective. We really like to hear from you children also. Sounds like the medications are working and things will get better. I know it is hard to wait but God will use this waiting time to do good things too. (o:
Dear Second Oldest Kid in the Maier family,
Thank you for another moving and informative perspective. You and your sister have really helped those of us who care about your family to better understand your struggle. I think I can answer one of your questions…………the one about how many people struggle with different things. The answer is everybody. Scripture tells us we will all have trials. But, you know what else? I’ve read the last page of The Book and everything turns out okay! At least for those who follow Jesus. So keep trusting Him. I could ramble on a lot longer, but maybe this is enough for now. So,
go hug your mom and dad!
Thank you for sharing your perspective. Through your questions regarding the struggles of others you are learning compassion and that is a beautiful quality to have. 🙂 May you shine His light brightly to the world so that they also may know His love!
Zephaniah 3:17 The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.
My heart is just bubbling over with love for you! I am so proud of you for sharing your feelings with us all. It’s kind of a big deal to be able to put in to words what you are feeling much less share it with the world. But what is so awesome, is that when you are able to share how you feel, it not only helps us know how to pray for you, but it also encourages us to be more “real”, too! The impact on His kingdom that you will be able to make on your friends and even to perfect strangers is huge. So keep trusting, keep sharing, keep praying, and keep being that sweet beautiful Esther with that contagious smile!!! I’m literally smiling right now just thinking about your smile! 🙂 I’m excited for you for this to be over, too! But until then…
“Rejoice in HOPE. Be patient in tribulation. Be constant in prayer.” Romans 12:12
Thanks for your honesty…..all your feelings and questions are exactly where you should be. These are great questions by the way! I find that when I’m in confusion and sadness and uncertainty, or something very painful is happening in my life, I am much more connected to the painful experiences of other’s as well. This makes me understand my fellow human family more too. Some who are reaching out to you are doing so because they relate to not exactly where you are, but have had similar experiences, and want to be there for you, if you need them. I’m glad you have a friend who has dealt with cancer. The two of you have an understanding and bond now that might be helpful.
To answer your question, there are millions of people who deal with cancer throughout this globe every year. There are support groups, lots of online services and various forums to help people, doctors, patients and family members who are dealing with cancer. You are most certainly not alone.
There are other 11-year-olds in this world, right now, who are dealing with cancer in their family too.
I am thinking of you and your whole family and sending you lots and lots and lots of love.
Dee Ann (Newkirk)
Los Angeles, CA
I appreciate your transparency in sharing your thoughts and heart. I’m glad to hear your faith is staying strong. And that you have been observing the out pouring of love through God’s people. He is helping you to stretch your perspective on life, caring about others and whether they know God or not. We are all looking forward to having all this be over and that things will go back to the old normal in your house. But none of you will ever be the same because of what God has brought you through. You’ll have more compassion for others and this is a very good thing!
Sandy, Williams Bay, WI
Dear Esther, you are an amazing young woman. You have a strong faith and a strong foundation in your life. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Love you. Aunt Peg
Well since this post is late you now are 12! Thank you for sharing your perspective. I know that this is not an easy time, with both Mom & your friend having cancer. I pray for them both every day. I know that God will give you the strength to handle it. Even though you are such a sweet & gentle soul, you still are tough as nails, as I have witnessed on the basketball court.
These are qualities that your Great Gramma Esther also had. In many ways I see her in you, but she had coal black hair, not blonde like you. She would be so proud of you, as we all are. I also know she is very proud of your mother with how she has managed her household, as Gramma Esther had 7 kids with Papa being the oldest. Knowing all well the hard work it is to raise them. Gramma also knew that her strength came only from God, and that by believing and living by his Word will lead to eternal life with our father in heaven.
I have been reading this verse a lot lately. Romans 5:1-5
Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in our hope of sharing the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit which has been given to us.
You are growing into such an amazing young lady, but I should not be too surprised as you have a great role model in your mother. I love and miss you my dear Essie!