In survival mode, one can do things that he or she could otherwise not do. The limits of pain and endurance are increased. Tolerance for risk in increased. Fear of pain is diminished and that fear is shifted to the fear of failure….to not survive. Think of a situation and play it out in your mind.
But people often don’t realize when it is time to be in survival mode. Or maybe they don’t have what it takes to survive; to hold on to the rope a little bit longer; to hold their breath underwater a few more seconds; to not stop moving when their body is cold.
Some people are more fearful of being offensive to someone than surviving. Like when a stranger is walking by your car and you are afraid to lock the door because the obvious noise it would make would be offensive.
I am amazed to hear of stories where someone’s hand got trapped and they starved to death. Clearly not a survivor. I would either get unstuck or chew my hand off.
What I cannot figure out right now is if I am stuck and I need to chew my hand off, or do I need to hold on a bit longer; hold my breath a few more seconds; and not stop moving. Do I keep ignoring the call to ease? It is telling me to take a break, to slow down at work, to sleep a little extra, and take time for myself. Or do I keep going? Doing the job when its hard. Take care of what needs caring for, even if I get less sleep. But at some point the hand will lose strength to hold on; the breath will give out; the cold will take over the body. The wisdom in it all is to know when that time is near, then retreat.
Tomorrow will tell us a lot. We have a meeting with Dr. Bible around noon. We’ll discuss the next phase. We’ll see the numbers. We’ll gain perspective on the whole situation. Chemo could be done and that will be a relief.
But through it all, we are not miserable, just tired. God is faithful to sustain us. He gives us strength to keep going. He gives us wisdom. He gives us hope and joy. He helps us survive.