…..Tara laid in the hospital bed with tubes out of her chest and abdomen recovering from a surgery that proved to save her life. At the time, we were new to the game of survival and had ‘naive hope’; that is the hope someone has when they really don’t know what is coming. It actually may have only been optimism rather than hope, I don’t know for sure.
Since that time, we passed from that naive hope or optimism, through fear, past solemn reality, beyond mere survival, to brokenness and desperation, to sustenance, back to optimism (not naive this time) and right back to plain old life, which is where we are now. It sure seems like it should be different on this side of all that, but that path of least resistance sure is living up to its name.
Tara had a great appointment the other day. Chest X-ray, abdominal CT scan and blood work all say that cancer is still at bay; a full 18 months since chemotherapy.
We are thankful for life without the acute battle right now. But the chronic battles almost seem more difficult; the every-day-life stuff that everyone deals with. Tara is feeling well and has been for a long time. It is easy to say “Thank you, God, for keeping Tara alive.” That seems so trite in light of all the goodness He showed us. I should be saying “Thank you, God, for your goodness and for all that you taught us through this.” But for now, I’m stuck on the first, and I’ll ponder the latter a bit more.