I Can’t See You

As a baby, Lewis would hide by covering his face.  I probably did the same when I was a baby. How simple. If I can’t see you then you aren’t there.  For the baby, what a convenient way to get out of a situation. I wish I hadn’t grown out of that. The adult equivalent of this would be the age-old fantasy of being able to disappear on command.

Sometimes Tara and I seem to try this trick with problems. Maybe if we aren’t talking about it…. Maybe if we work a lot….  Maybe if we have friends over…  Maybe if we serve together….  Maybe… if we do these things, the problems, the cancer, or anything else “bad” won’t exist.  I guess I’m talking more about myself on this one.  Tara does much better at facing the problems.  

But God has more for me than this.  How can I embrace the challenges instead of burying my head in the sand?  I don’t want to run from the fight. I want the story.  The experience.  The sharpening.  The growth. I want to learn dependence and really enjoy it. 

Tara has the big dose on Monday along with an exam. We may learn a bit about how everything is going. But we may not learn much, depending on what the doc can decipher without a scan. We are optimistic and sort of keeping our hands over our face pretending we don’t see the monster.

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4 thoughts on “I Can’t See You

  1. I’m so sorry you both are having to face this monster. And maybe you feel you are hiding. But it seems more that you are just carrying on and not just giving up. You might not feel brave, but your witness is brave indeed. Thank you for sharing. Praying that you can continue to see how God is refining you all.

  2. We have been praying for you all! Praying over tomorrow-His power to strengthen you Tara and fill your heart with His peace. Love, Navina and all

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