I Can’t See You

As a baby, Lewis would hide by covering his face.  I probably did the same when I was a baby. How simple. If I can’t see you then you aren’t there.  For the baby, what a convenient way to get out of a situation. I wish I hadn’t grown out of that. The adult equivalent of this would be the age-old fantasy of being able to disappear on command.

Sometimes Tara and I seem to try this trick with problems. Maybe if we aren’t talking about it…. Maybe if we work a lot….  Maybe if we have friends over…  Maybe if we serve together….  Maybe… if we do these things, the problems, the cancer, or anything else “bad” won’t exist.  I guess I’m talking more about myself on this one.  Tara does much better at facing the problems.  

But God has more for me than this.  How can I embrace the challenges instead of burying my head in the sand?  I don’t want to run from the fight. I want the story.  The experience.  The sharpening.  The growth. I want to learn dependence and really enjoy it. 

Tara has the big dose on Monday along with an exam. We may learn a bit about how everything is going. But we may not learn much, depending on what the doc can decipher without a scan. We are optimistic and sort of keeping our hands over our face pretending we don’t see the monster.

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