Our 2 oldest girls were at a formal at our church this evening featuring a comedian. I can imagine the laughter heard through that room. The chuckles, snorts, giggles, chortles and cackles, both high pitched and low. I can imagine the faces that were cramping from smiling so much, the tears that wound up on sleeves and napkins, the sore bellies from the constant tightening with good, old fashioned, hysterical laughter.

But imagining is about as close as I’ll get for the time being. During the last 73 days Tara and I haven’t had much laughter. And I miss it. We miss it. We need it. There is a difference between having peace and joy versus laughter. The one we have and I think that seems most critical. The other we need, but I’m not sure to what extent. We need to lighten things around our home, or at least our room. The kids seem to still have it, so I think we should start there and spend more time with them while they are laughing..and join in with them.

Although the overall pattern of Tara’s progress is moving in the right direction, this particular day wasn’t so good. Her stomach is giving her fits, almost to the point of going in to get it checked out. If it wasn’t the weekend, where we would end up in the emergency room, we probably would have gone. So we’ll see how tomorrow goes and make our decision from there.

We know God is with us, but today He seemed distant. My prayers seemed just like words that I was trying to put together that ended up not making much sense. I am really counting on tomorrow. While we typically go to church on Saturday, this week we are going Sunday. So God, I challenge you to meet us, both there and here. Lock eyes with us. Refine us. Give us peace, joy and laughter in our hearts and our home.


6 thoughts on “LOL

  1. Dear Tara and Jay,
    My heart aches for you this morning, i feel the pain. My prayer is that God will gather you in His arms, carry you close to His heart, and gently lead you this day. (Isaiah 40: 11) He knows how weary you are, loves you and will renew your strength. (vs 28-31)
    There will be extra prayers going up for you today. Sandy Stensland

  2. Praying for Tara’s stomach pain and praying that your home would be filled with laughter!

    Romans 8:26 (MSG)
    “Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.”

  3. Thinking of you all this morning and praying that comfort has come your way. Weariness comes from the long journey but those of us that are praying are asking God to refresh you moment by moment. May your day be filled with joy, love and laughter…. Love and hugs coming your way, Aunt Barb

  4. Ah, how good it is to be able to laugh. You sure have that right. And thinking of laughter as rain for a weary spirit, how hard it is to endure the deserts. I echo Sandy’s words. May the blessing of laughter take you by surprise in the coming days. Becca

  5. Hi Tara & Jay, Still praying for you, but wanted to update you on something I told you earlier. Our granddaughter Ruthie (Calvin) Bearhs and her husband, Taylor and son Oliver will be moving to Rochester sometime in the next several month. Taylor will be doing an internship at Mayo staring sometime in June, 2013. They were house hunting there yesterday, Ruthie’s dad, Steve told me.
    Also in reading one of your posts that you needed to have some humor. A friend of mine send me the following yesterday. Hope it will tickle your funny bone!
     Those wonderful Church Bulletins!
     These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS) actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

    The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
    The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on the Water.’ The sermon tonight: ‘Searching for Jesus.’
    Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
    Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say ‘Hell’ to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
    Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.
    Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I will not pass this way again’, giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
    For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
    Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
    Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
    A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow..
    At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’ Come early and listen to our choir practice.
    Trust God met you in your worship today!! Love and our continued prayers
    for God’s healing touch. Donna Lu Anderson

  6. Tara:)
    It is Julia from Bible Study Small Group and I just wanted you and your family to know that you are in my prayers daily, if not hourly. I met with Jodi B yesterday for a few hours and she shared with me the website and filled me in on the story. To no surprise, as I began to smile and weep through each journal entry, it became very evident from day one of your diagnosis, that you made a choice to use your story for His glory and you were not going to let this darkness overpower your light! I called my Mom immediately after meeting with Jodi to ask her to pray….when I told her on the phone she let out a small gasp and then boldly stated, “Well we are praying right now that Tara will be Healed and made whole in Jesus Name,” and that is what we are going to continue to boldly believe.

    This website is amazing and brings back many memories to me of when I used to log my miracle story daily on Caring Bridge and draw strength and hope from each response. I pray that you rest Tara, lean on those around you for strength, and as the sunshine hits your face each morning you are renewed with rays of faith and hope. Mornings were always the hardest for me to gather strength to rise from bed and embrace another day but the scripture that always and continues to give me comfort is:

    “Come to Me, all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30.
    Love and Hugs!

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