Brother trips began in the summer 1991. Mark had just finished high school and I my sophomore year in college. We packed up our backpacks and headed to the Boundary Waters Canoe Area (BWCA), entering the wilderness outside of Grand Marais. We parked at one of the trailheads where we had a local take our picture. We were in full gear.
In the background of the picture sat mom and dad’s tan Honda Accord with the 4 doors open and the trunk popped. Fortunately that ‘local’ who took our picture lived in sight of the parking lot, because when we returned he informed us that we had left the car exactly as the picture showed it; all 4 doors open and the trunk popped.
Don’t ask me why we decided to hike instead of canoe (a mistake which we will never repeat due to the number of mosquito bites endured), but we were so focused on the mission that we forgot the most basic and obvious thing; to shut the car doors. How could we have missed that?
How could we have missed enjoying the weekend? It just flew by, again. It seems pretty basic that we would have a plan to get a few things done, then we would accomplish those things and then enjoy some time as a family. Easier said than done. The week ended fast and furious. I had to work a bit on Saturday and then Sunday came…and went, and now here we are. It is hard to make a plan when you have no motivation. So we had no plan and got done everything on that list.
Our conversations are getting a bit shallow. We can only talk about the same things so many times. It is no longer moving to think about or talk about our situation. What used to inspire us to live well is now just bogging us down. About the time Tara gets energy, she gets knocked down and has a day in bed. Really it just ticks her off.
So we need to lose focus of the mission, and simply remember to enjoy the day. And sometimes the day will be too much to take in and try to enjoy, and we will simply have to enjoy a moment.
That’s classic! Forgetting to close the doors- and it’s great that it’s in a picture! Motivation. Somehow some days the only things that get done are the things that scream loudest and I wonder why this should be unsettling? Isn’t that where God has all of us? Tara resting when her body says rest while you work when it has to get done (praise The Lord for the work of our hands) and the kids rest and play and of course fight (the internal and external battles!) But I realized today that I’d rather be in a family plugging along even through the toughest stuff than having all the me time in the world. Embrace it. Superheroes are for Wehrenberg theaters. Real life is for the rest of us and as long as we remember where our hope comes from, we live. I just thought of this verse and opened my bible right to it- was the first glimpse of my eyes. (I still remember Piper reading this 12/26/11. It’s meant to go in here for you all: psalm 121. I lift up my eyes to the hills- where does my help come from? My help comes from The Lord, the maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip- he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you- The Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, not the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm – he will watch over your life, The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
I learn so much from you all as I venture on my journey. It, fortunately, does not involve cancer but does involve the same ups and downs of life. It’s a blessing for me to try to refocus (continuously trying to correct and correct again). Thank you so much for writing honestly and openly.
We continue to pray for you all. We will continue to as te days continue to pass.
I treasure reading your posts. The “new normal” seems to be in place, so now perhaps you will find inspiration in those things extraordinarily outside your normal.